Humor as a Path to Peace

Mary Kay Morrison 

When many of our great leaders were faced with crisis and challenges, they used their sense of humor to ease the tension and open the road to peace.  Churchill and Kennedy were two of our leaders who were able to diffuse and disarm their adversaries by leading with laughter.  One of Churchill’s quotes to soften the blow of his difficult remarks; “When I am abroad I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the Government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home.”  I think these leaders believed one of my favorite quotes; “First you get them to laugh and then you get them to think!”  Infusing positive humor into tense situations provides a release of negative emotions.  It is difficult to feel anger while one is laughing.  Humor relieves tension and reduces stress.  The benefits of humor are enormous but one of the greatest benefits is the ability to facilitate communication.  From my book, Using Humor to Maximize Learning, Exploring the Links between Positive Emotions and Education  is this quote; “Using humor to build and maintain relationships is an invaluable skill. Emotional intelligence (EI), the ability to perceive assess and influence one’s own and other people’s emotions is essential for knowing when and how to use humor effectively. (Goleman 1998) The ability to use humor as a part of interpersonal dialogue requires confidence in one’s own humor strengths, a fun-loving playful spirit and the willingness to risk the extraordinary.” Humor generates trust and can facilitate a reduction in tension, fear and anger. It takes a effort to assist others in seeing the “humor” in difficult situations, however laughter can nurture communication and ease tense situations. Exaggeration, puns, and self-deprecating humor are tools of the trade. When we are able to use reframing (example: the ridiculous or exaggeration) as a devise to facilitate a shift in context it encourages both individuals and groups to think creatively.  Laughter can quickly dispel tension and increase the capacity for dialogue.  Most of us experience unexpected change, suffering and loss in our lives. As we are able to find the humor in a situation, we can begin to heal and move ahead. Difficult experiences, if met with hope and optimism can generate remarkable growth opportunities. In fact, humor frequently emerges from the down side of our lives.  Inner peace comes when we are able to find humor in our painful experiences.   We trust the people that we laugh with.  Fun and trust go hand in hand.  Peaceful solutions will be found when we experience laughter and joy as an integral part of our lives.   Mary Kay Morrison is founder and director of Humor Quest and author of Using Humor to Maximize Learning; The Links between Positive Emotions and Education Rowman and Littlefield, January 2008

Please visit her web site at;http://www.questforhumor.com  You can reach her at: marykay@questforhumor.com

Mary Kay also serves on the AATH (Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor) Board of Directors. http://www.aath.org/  

What if we looked at some of the most popular organizations and associations that provide services to our young people? Is there a common thread within their missions? How do these organizations promote the skills and abilities for the transition from childhood to adulthood? What are those skills and abilities anyway?

Review of MissionSelection CriteriaOrganizations below were selected based upon their inclusion in a review of the top clubs and organizations for young people according to About.com. About.com did not specify selection criteria, but one would assume that these organizations were selected based upon membership and popularity.Each organization is categorized in one of six categories: volunteering, scouting, sports, religious, academic, and agricultural. National Associations follow. With the exception of AWANA, each organization has published a mission or purpose statement on their website. Below is a list of these organizations, the website from which the mission or purpose was retrieved, along with the specific statement. 

1. Volunteering

K-Kids and Builder’s Clubhttp://www.kkids.org/about/objects.asp

To provide opportunities for working together in service to school and community.

To develop leadership potential.

To foster the development of strong moral character.

To encourage loyalty to school, community, and nation.

Key Clubhttp://www.keyclub.org/about/objects.asp“Key Club is an international student-led organization which provides its members with opportunities to provide service, build character and develop leadership.” 

2. Scouting

Girl Scoutshttp://www.gscsm.org/aboutuspromiselawmission.htmGirl Scouting builds girls of courage, confidence and character, who make the world a better place. 

Boy Scoutshttp://www.scouting.org/Media/mission.aspxThe mission of the Boy Scouts of America is to prepare young people to make ethical and moral choices over their lifetimes by instilling in them the values of the Scout Oath and Law.

3. Sports

YMCAhttp://www.ymca.org“Putting Christian principles into practice through programs that build spirit, mind, and body for all”American Youth Footballhttp://www.americanyouthfootball.com/about.asp#MissionAmerican Youth Football, Inc., established in 1996, is an international youth football organization established to promote the wholesome development of youth through their association with adult leaders in the sport of American football. Rules and regulations are established to ensure that players play in an atmosphere of safety with a competitive balance between teams.American Youth Soccerhttp://soccer.org/home.aspx
AYSO reaffirms its commitment to develop and deliver quality youth soccer programs that promote fun, are conducted in a family environment, and are based on the AYSO philosophies of:  

? Everyone Plays  

? Balanced Teams  

? Open Registration  

? Positive Coaching  

? Good Sportsmanship  

4. Religious

Awanahttp://www.bethelefc.org/childrens.htm (this is where the mission statement was retrieved)“The purpose of Awana Clubs International is to evangelize, challenge and train the youth of the world, through the local church, by providing Bible-based, Christ-centered weekly club programs and training leadership.”Young Judeahttp://www.youngjudaea.orgYoung Judaea is built on a framework that emphasizes three core facets: peer leadership, political non-partisanship, and religious pluralism. Within this framework, our programs and activities focus on instilling our members with three core values: Judaism, Zionism, and Jewish identity.Challenge Clubs for Girls Catholic Youth
http://www.challengeclubs.org“To enable today’s young woman to give her best to others so that Christian culture will prevail in the heart of each person and in every society.”Conquest Clubs for Boys Catholic Youthhttp://www.conquestxlubs.comConQuest is based on Catholic principles of spiritual development. Its programs are designed to instill virtue, develop character and encourage spiritual growth, while offering its participants challenging physical, intellectual and spiritual activities within an atmosphere of adventure. 

5. Academic

National Honor Society

http://www.nhs.us/s_nhs/sec.asp?CID=135&DID=5290#art1

The purpose of this organization shall be to create enthusiasm for scholarship, to stimulate a desire to render service, to promote leadership, and to develop character in the students of secondary schools.

Future Business Leaders of America

http://www.fbla-pbl.org/web/page/625/sectionid/614/pagelevel/2/main_interior.asp

Our mission is to bring business and education together in a positive working relationship through innovative leadership and career development programs.

Junior Achievement

http://www.ja.org/about/about_who_vision.shtml

To inspire and prepare young people to succeed in a global economy.

6. Agricultural

Future Farmers of America

http://www.ffa.org/index.cfm?method=c_about.mission

The National FFA Organization is dedicated to making a positive difference in the lives of students by developing their potential for premier leadership, personal growth and career success through agricultural education. 

4-H

http://www.national4-hheadquarters.gov/library/4H-HQ_mission.pdf

The mission of National 4-H Headquarters is to advanceknowledge for agriculture, the environment, human health and well-being, and communities by creating opportunities for youth. 

National AssociationsNational Park and Recreation Associationhttp://www.nrpa.org/content/default.aspx?documentId=490“To advance parks, recreation and environmental conservation efforts that enhance the quality of life for all people.” 

National Endowment for the Arts                 

http://www.nea.gov/about/facts/AtAGlance.html 

The National Endowment for the Arts is a public agency dedicated to supporting excellence in the arts, both new and established; bringing the arts to all Americans; and providing leadership in arts education. 

An excerpt from Mental Well-Beingby Ann Boroch, N.D., C.Ht.– “The key to having peace of mind is becoming more conscious of what thoughts you entertain all day and consciously choosing the words you speak.  You may not be able to stop a negative thought from coming in, but you do have free will and choice of what you are going to do with that thought once it comes into your awareness.  What gets us into trouble is when a negative thought stays with us for a certain period of time.” 

No violence

Harmony

No bullying

Treat everyone as an equal

Two fingers

Love and care

Treat others the way you would like to be treated

Don’t talk when others are talking

No saying bad words

Hippies

Tie-dye

Stop wars

When life throws a curve ball at us, it can be hard to cope and find inner peace.  How can we have peace of mind when someone we love is suffering (especially those of us caretakers)?  A dear friend of mine reminded me of something important to remember.  Her message helped me find some peace during my time filled with falling tears, blood being drawn, blood being transfused, tests being taken, doctors reporting, drugs being administered, fears becoming realizations…  As my friend said, ”people may throw ‘crap’ at you like–  ‘It happened for a reason,’ ‘You don’t get things that you can’t handle.’”  Just as my friend told me, “I won’t give you any [crap either] but I do know that one thing that helped me was to just understand that there are things that I just can’t change but I can do everything to accept it and figure out a way to help/cope.”  I hope passing this message along might help one other person who is struggling to find inner peace in a time of turmoil.  There are people who feel your pain and have been through something similar to what you are going through.  It might be easier said than done, but in times of turmoil, we must find inner peace so we can be strong for our loved ones.    Yes, those ”waves of emotions” (as I like to call them) will come and go…but, let’s find ways to keep our peace and our faith.  Deep breathe…one day at a time.  Open-mind.  Positive mental attitude. Meditation.  Kind gestures.  Thoughts and prayers.  Whatever helps you find some inner peace and whatever helps you to help that person you love.  Let any feelings of helplessness and confusion flow out of you and re-focus that energy on figuring out what you can do right now to cope and help.
 

When I grow up I want to be a fire fighter.  I want to use a fire hose and save people. I also want to be a police officer and help people and a doctor too.

Joey wants to talk about being a family. He says that if you are mean, it’s important to say you’re sorry. Take good care of your family and wait for them and don’t peek on them if they want privacy in the potty.

Maybe if you want to be nice you can share your halloween candy. That would be a good choice.

Yesterday at school I was mad and called Cole a girl and he hit me. That made me feel sad so I hid by a bush. My teacher talked to us about being friends and saying sorry when we hurt someone’s feelings. Cole and I hugged each other. Now we are buddies.

I am an elementary World Languages teacher, and I am so excited that my close friends and I  have started this website! I hope visitors will be open to sharing their knowledge, beliefs, and resources surrounding peace.  The climate of our small world depends on global collaboration.  As I work with young children each day, I see how impressionable they are…how willing they are to work together.  I realize how important it is to start this dialogue at an early age.  Children are more open to being accepting of cultural diversity; they have the potential to change the future…one way to do this is by teaching children about peace :-)!  We need more believers.  We need more peace.  Love & Peace, Erin